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Tuesday, 28 October 2014

Marriage: Do Or Die Mentality.

Yesterday evening, I came across a post on Facebook that left me mortified. A lady (went under the guise of anonymous in a FB group) wrote a post and was asking for advice. She just discovered that her sister's husband has been sleeping with their 14-year old niece who was living with the couple. She also discovered that he had done same with another 13-year old extended family member who lived with their mother. I guess the only reason they aren't pregnant yet is because they say he uses condoms, which further proves that he is a calculative and unrepentant pedophile. The lady expressed her shock and even said she fainted upon hearing the news, which was told to her in confidence by the victims, as she least expected it from the man being a deacon in church and all that razzmatazz. Her speaking out was to get advice on how to proceed with the case because she did not know how her sister would take it and what would become of the marriage. 

Sigh. If you thought that was bad, you should have read parts of the comments that flooded in afterwards. I was furious and disgusted by the reaction of some of the "advisers". Some of them went on and on about how she had to keep quiet to save her sister's marriage, others said she should first report to the pastor of the church he attends, still some asked that sleeping dogs should be left to lie, after all WWJD (what would Jesus do)? Oh, let's not forget the ones who felt it was a "spiritual attack on the man and he should go for deliverance". The one that slayed me the most were the 007 Jane Bonds, who felt a trap should be set to catch him in the act by using the same defiled victims as bait!!! Sigh.

At what point did we lose our senses of reasoning and judgement all in a bid to be religiously correct? How can any sane person NOT realize that a man who sleeps with a minor is a pedophile who deserves to be locked away forever? So what he's a deacon, Sunday school teacher and whatchamacallit, the fact remains that he raped two under-aged girls left in his care and those are the ones we know of yet. By virtue of his religious position, he has a wider access to more under-aged children, so covering this up is all shades of wrong. Such scum should be locked far away from the society rather than living in our midst, acting normal yet unleashing havoc upon our children.

I know the pressures to get married which our society puts on single ladies and I absolutely abhor it because it beclouds their judgement when they get into unfavorable and clearly dangerous unions. Why should anyone be forced to stay in a union with a pedophile or an ousted homosexual (who by the way also got married under pressure and to avoid the stigma of being gay) just to save face and be seen to be morally upright by the society? It isn't enough for us to sit back and condemn such abominable acts, rather it is up to us all to cry out in one voice and see to it that rape crimes are known to be just that, CRIMES.

If you are aware of anyone who is a victim of rape, especially a minor kept in the care of the molester, it is your civic and moral duty to report to the right authorities. It is our collective duties to protect our children and ourselves, so please do not think or condone the thought of act of shielding a rapist at the detriment of the victim. It is a cruel, unjustifiable and unacceptable act. 

I know the Nigerian Police are often not as responsive as we would want them, but I think they are getting better. There are also very dependable NGOs that are focused on rape cases to which you can report and they would ensure you get justice and also help rehabilitate the victims. One of such is Stand To End Rape Initiative and their contact details are:

STER Initiative
No. 9A Tinubu Road, Coker Extension, Ilupeju Lagos.
Mobile:  +2348095967000


  1. @uwandulu

    It's sad that such low-life would probably get away with and our society would simply chalk it down to "na devil work"
    I can bet you the church would cover him and the worst that would happen is a slap on the wrist.

  2. Always said most of us have been bound by culture to the extent that we have become blind to hard facts. Culture was made by man for man and should be altered to suit man as things go on. A man like that should have no respect. Church of old testament won't cover him. Punish him severely. If he wants to be an elder, he should be without blemish.


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