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Friday 29 May 2015

The Day Finally Came.


Today is a remarkable day in Nigeria as President Mohammed Buhari is sworn in as the new President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. His inaugural speech was full of hope and reassurance that indeed a positive change has come to stay in Nigeria. He has promised to tackle the issue of Boko Haram head-on and has said the Command and Control Center of  the Nigerian Army will be moved to Maiduguri in Bornu State until Boko Haram is totally defeated. He's also promised to do his best possible to bring back the missing Chibok girls.

He promised dealing with issues such as security, electricity, unemployment rates, investments for SMEs, etc. One thing that stood out most in his speech was his stance on his independence. He stated clearly that he does not belong to anybody and that nobody belongs to him. I take this to mean he would be calling the shots rather than dancing to any one person's tune at the expense of the greater good of all Nigerians. Way to go Presido Buhari. 

Congratulations to all well-meaning Nigerians as we step into the new regime. May all our wishes and hopes for a better Nigeria come true.

Thursday 28 May 2015

TGIT And Have A Laugh

My brother used to own lots of cats, so I know how much of a handful these cute pet can get sometimes, lol. 
How To Give A Cat A Pill
1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand... As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. 

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. 

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. 

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later... 

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap. 

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band. 

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve the cat from across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap. 

13. Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down. 

14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table. 

15. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

How To Give A Dog A Pill 

1. Wrap it in bacon.

Wednesday 27 May 2015

All That Glitters Is NOT Gold


I encountered the most bizarre incident today and it would be unpatriotic and unfair of me not to bring it to public notice. So I was at a sort of bus-stop this morning around Maryland, having a conversation with an older friend when a handsome and dashing looking man approached us and asked to speak with the man I was speaking with. He asked him to wait and kept talking to me but I got uncomfortable and felt perhaps what the stranger wanted to discuss was probably more important. I asked my friend to attend to him while I tried to get some petrol. He said he was sure the man wanted to make inquiries about me and nothing else and that he would prove himself right. I was taken aback but kept my cool. He moved away to see the man and came back smiling because he was right, after all. 

The strange man had asked him if he knew me but he warned him to stay away from me as I was spoken for. The man excused himself under the pretext that he needed to use the loo. When my friend told me all these, I was wide-eyed in surprise because I never expected such. Then came the twist to the story. 

About four different individuals came up to us at different times to inform us that the man was notorious for coming to that bus-stop early every morning, search for ladies, take them away for God knows what and then return (without them) in search for more females. He does this every day!!  -_- They were sure he uses the innocent victims for some sort of money rituals and that he often puts something in his mouth (juju/voodoo) before talking to them thereby making them surrender to his advances without fuss. I was gobsmacked and wondered how such a thing could be going on without the police being involved. They did say a squad of SARS Team had been notified at some point but they were unable to apprehend him and that they haven't pushed further because there is no proper evidence that he actually harms these ladies.

Hmmmmn. I just want to implore the ladies out there to be careful. All that glitters is not gold and no amount of money is worth risking your life and safety for. I wish I had taken a picture of this man and perhaps gotten to question him to sound him out about these allegations. This encounter only makes me apprehensive when I think of the several missing persons adverts I have seen recently. He apparently works in a bank, drives exotic cars among which is the Lexus he came in this morning and is so calm and easy on the eyes that no one would ever suspect him of such atrocities as he's being accused of. I wish the authorities would read this and take action on it.  


Tuesday 26 May 2015

Lighten Up Your Day



Here's an enjoyable video to douse the tension around now. If you can have fuel or network service to access it, that is. Sigh. 

I smiled through it, bless his cute self. :)


Monday 25 May 2015

The Petrocalypse Is Upon Us



In what is being termed online as the #Petrocalypse, our great nation is slowly grinding to a halt. The fuel scarcity is worsening and no one knows for sure how long it would take for normalcy to return. I had to take my kids to school today and I've been told that there wouldn't be classes tomorrow and possibly the rest of the week. Banks are closing early and even the telecommunication companies are sending out memos to similar effect if things do not change fast.



We are being hit left, right and center. You could be rejoicing that at least you've got diesel to run the generator in your company to keep you going for a while and then you get a notification from the internet provider who haven't been so lucky. Everything and everyone are connected at the end of the day. 

Seems to me like the country is on auto-pilot mode and no one knows where the destination to which we are being steered is.

Sunday 24 May 2015

Nigeria On My Mind.



It is safe to say that Nigeria (well, Lagos and Abuja. And these two are the hub of the country anyway) is presently in a state of comatose and her affairs are being run on autopilot mode. Nigeria is Africa's largest oil producer yet we are experiencing the worst fuel shortages ever. 

The fuel crisis is not even funny any longer as people are starting to realize the bigger implication of how "everything" may stop if this scarcity isn't dealt with ASAP. Two days ago, I had to get someone to take my car and a keg to a village deep inside Ikorodu in search of fuel. We eventually got fuel into the car at N150 per liter and into the keg at N200 per liter, a far cry from the N87 per liter it's usually sold at.

Power supply in Nigeria is nothing to write home about and usually people depend on generators to get by, so you can imagine how business and homes are struggling to cope in darkness as there's no light nor fuel to power the generators. It's as if President Jonathan conceded defeat during the election and then folded his arms and rested! This is preposterous and very unfair to the citizens of this country.


People started to realize just how terrible things are last night when at least three radio stations announced that they would be shutting down before 9pm until today in a bid to conserve their fuel stock. Even MTN, one of Nigeria's top telecommunications company released a statement about how they have to start rationing their fuel supply and this would definitely affect networks. This crisis is an absolute nightmare for HR and Admin officers and business owners to deal with. No one is immune to the chaos about to be unleashed if this scarcity continues.

I'm really surprised that people haven't taken to the streets yet in protest but I know that this week will determine what happens next. This is what Nigeria has become, the Lion of Africa has been reduced to lower than a toothless bulldog. What a crying shame and a pity.

Friday 22 May 2015

An Embarrassment And A Lesson......




I came across the letter below and while I cannot confirm its authenticity, I dare say it only highlights how deep in trouble Nigeria is with regards to the looming fuel crisis. You can also see a part of the disruption and discomfort it brings with it. A whole Nigeria, the Giant of Africa has been reduced to ground level by greedy and selfish politicians.



If this letter is genuine, I must commend Virgin Atlantic for having the good sense and courteousness to carry their passengers along rather than just do an Arik on the poor passengers. This is how sensible organizations are run and if you own a business or service clients, this is how to treat them and keep them. It really isn't rocket science or juju working for those who succeed by doing right by their clients. :) 

I have been on a hunt for petrol and diesel all day and frankly I am exasperated and angry at the futility of my efforts. Why haven't the authorities (Ministry of Petroleum, etc) come forward to explain what exactly is going on and also tell us what they are doing about it to make life easier for Nigerians? Why aren't Nigerians hitting the streets yet to protest and demand an explanation for this hardship? There is no fuel to run our vehicles and none to power our generators and there is little or no power supply! How much longer shall we continue like this?

Thursday 21 May 2015

It's Been An Awesome ONE YEAR!!!!!!!


Yes. I have been blogging for over a year but today marks one year since I have been using this platform. Can I get a Whoop Whoop? :)


It has been a journey and I have enjoyed every step of it. Out of the 365 days between now and when I started, I think I only missed out on a few days (less than 15) which is pretty impressive and hard even if I do say so myself. Hehehe.

I cannot thank you all enough for the love and support over the weeks. I am really grateful to you all for visiting my blogs daily and leaving comments. 



Special shout out to my BlogFeature writers and my regular commentators. You rock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Special birthday shout out to Ayomide. I owe you one, girl. Thank you.



Cheers to another year and I forge ahead. Thank you, thank you, thank you. 


Before Life Got Complex....

Who remembers when life was like this.........


I do and as much as I itched to get past those times, these days aren't so safe and as fun as expected. Sure things have improved but with the improvements have come the side-effects on humanity. What do you miss the most from way back?

C'est la vie, oui? (Such is life, yes?)   :)

A Brand New Day


Good morning to you.

I know I haven't posted anything in days and I am truly sorry and feel so guilty about it. I have been incredibly busy and very tired. Whenever I don't show up for days (hopefully that won't happen again) do make sure you catch up on previous posts you could have missed. Especially post from when I began the blog. :)

Do have a wonderful and prosperous day ahead. Remember to be #AllHeartsAlways today by reaching out to the needy around you. :) 

Monday 18 May 2015

Forgiveness

Happy new week to everyone.

I do apologize for being M.I.A from the blogosphere. I've missed you all and I've missed writing out my thoughts so much too. 

Here we go:


I came across the picture above on Twitter and it struck me deep enough to want to make a post out of it. I'm sure you've come across similar quotes with the same underlying message that it is better to forgive and move on with your life than get shackled down by unforgiveness and the loathing that comes with it. 

What I've never really seen is how to really let go of the hurt and anger that breeds unforgiveness. They make it seem to easy like you should wave a wand around and every pain that has been caused would just disappear. It's not, especially if the erring person is a repeat offender and one that you can't cut off from abruptly. Forgiveness is a healing process and people should be allowed to go through that process until they get to the point of letting go. 

One must always have the quotes at the back of ones mind throughout the process for easy breakthrough. Perhaps the steps below can also help in the healing process: 

1) Find yourself a happy place and don't allow anyone or any negative actions taint the place. 

2) View life as a victor and not a victim. 

3) Do you and be happy. 

4) Don't stoop to conquer but rather rise above petty sentiments. 

5) Be successful. Nothing can beat that feeling of personal success. 

Friday 15 May 2015

Sweet Love



I came across this image and I just had to share. :) I wish more couples had such mentalities of absolute and pure love, without violence or selfishness.


Wednesday 13 May 2015

What's Your Week Looking Like? :)



P.s: I began the post below on Monday and only just completed it. Keep reading and you will understand why...... :)


Hello blog readers/visitors, how was your weekend? Mine was so packed that I barely got 5 straight hours of sleep all through Phew! And then due to circumstances beyond my control, I had to wake up by 4am to prepare for work but then I couldn't leave my house until 7am for the same reason why I had to wake up that early (rme)



Alas, being a Monday in Lagos (oh, you didn't get the memo? The traffic gods usually have board-meetings on Monday mornings  in Lagos), it took me two hours to drive from home to work but I had psyched myself up last night not to allow anything get to me negatively today come what may and I'm on that path. #MindOverMatterBaby I called ahead of course to inform the office I was running late and I got a pass (Yay Boss!) but had to go in straight to meetings back to back. I still wasn't daunted yet because I choose to be happy and positive today. 



Then I remembered that my brother had given me a delicious chocolate cake on Sunday, which I brought in to work, so I quickly indulged in the lushness of it all. If you still haven't placed an order with Cake Mayor, you're missing out big time. #Fact :)

Things sort of got so fast afterwards as the amount of my workload suddenly tripled..........


On my way home, I hailed a taxi and had a most interesting encounter and experience. The cab was a very clean and new Hyundai car and the cabbie was a Hausa man (a Northerner). This was the first time I was coming across a Hausa cabbie in Lagos state and I have been taking loads of taxis here regularly for several years now. When I lived in Abuja it wasn't a rarity at all but in Lagos it is and I was mighty pleased to see him because it brought back pleasant nostalgic feelings from my brief stay in Abuja years ago. Anyways, I told him as much and he smiled and was so polite in his responses. Did I mention he was super cute and his rates very affordable as well? ;)



We got talking and I found out that he was a young married man with two young children and a burning desire to go back to school. He lost his father at a tender age and life has not been very fair to him. This however has not stopped him from working hard to turn his story around to the point he's at right now and neither has it killed his dream of getting quality education, giving his children the best and living a better life. I posted parts of his story on twitter and a lot of people asked for his phone number which I shared. I am also looking for a tutor on the mainland for him. If you know anyone that can teach him English and Maths for a few hours a week for between N10,000 - N15,000, please send me an email to bukiotuyemi@gmail.com. 

Also, if you ever need a reliable cabbie in Lagos, call Usman on 08022267689.

Ever since then, I have been so busy with so many things, which is why I am only just completing this post on Wednesday. Sigh. Unfortunately, I think I'm coming down with a fever or so. I'm sure it's stress related though, so I might not be as active on my blog for a few days. I'm taking things easy. :)

Take care and enjoy the rest of your week........ :) 

Tuesday 12 May 2015

Start Of Your Day With A Smile

So I was writing a post yesterday but I couldn't finish it because I had a really busy day. I will try to finish it today and add more gist to it because I had an amazing encounter on my way home yesterday evening. 

In the meantime, here's a cute video to begin your day with. It is bound to get you smiling. :) 





Sunday 10 May 2015

Happy Mothers' Day



It may seem like we have far too many Mothers' Day celebrations in a year and it may very well be true as well, but the bare truth is that being a mother is no easy feat. The pressures, the expectations, the responsibilities, the dependency, the sacrifices and so much more are huge tasks to take on. So please, indulge all Mothers and let them partake in these celebrations globally.  :)

Take time out to appreciate Mothers today.

Happy Mothers' Day. 


Friday 8 May 2015

Making Sense and Making History.....



Meet Mhairi Black, a Scottish politician and presently Britain's youngest Member of Parliament since 350 years ago. She was elected an MP at the age of 20 and is presently still a student yet Mhairi Black defeated Douglas Alexander, 47, in Paisley and Renfrewshire South by over 6,000 votes.

I hope this would inspire more youths to get involved in the things that really matter and also encourage more parents and guardians to propel their young children and wards towards attaining such seemingly impossible heights of success.

Way to go girl.

Thursday 7 May 2015

Family Is Everything



Have you ever heard of medical kidnap? It is a situation that arises when a parent loses custody of their child due to medical disputes. A good friend of mine sent me a link to a shocking and appalling story about her relatives being denied access to their child by the Child Protection Services in Houston. The whole family is hurting so much because 19-month-old Ali has not only been separated from his parents and relatives, he has been separated from his twin sister as well. 

While his twin is growing normally, Ali has slow development and was already in therapy before being taken away from his parents. Even though there is no substantial evidence to prove it, the authorities have concluded that perhaps the parents are responsible for Ali's slow development and they feel it is best to take him away from them. Medically, he has been diagnosed as  having ' failure to thrive, lack of normal physiological development for unspecified reasons' ,  but this should not yet warrant the harsh action by the CPS authorities. I am all for being cautious when it comes to child care but to swiftly take a wee baby away from his loved ones based on unsubstantiated proof of negligence is just wrong. I sincerely hope that this post and similar ones to it on other websites would go viral and dear Ali would be given back to his family. I cannot even begin to imagine how his parents must be feeling. 

Do share. Thanks.




Wednesday 6 May 2015

#iSpyInGidi - Shitty Creativity

Guess what I spotted on my way to work this morning. A sewage truck with a very creative and nasty warning sign at the back of it. I took the warning very seriously and backed off sharply. LOL.

"Shit business is good business" after all. :)





Tuesday 5 May 2015

The Burning Forest....



I'm appalled and shocked at the amount of women and children that have been rescued from the Sambisa forest in the past couple of weeks. Everyone knew that evil Shekau, the assumed leader of the Boko Haram Terrorist group, was located in the Sambisa forest and even though I have asked times without numbers, why the heck the forest couldn't be invaded sooner? 

Why did we allow terrorists to set up a full community in Sambisa with OUR wives, sisters and mothers? Who can ever really know the extent of atrocities committed inside the Sambisa forest? Why weren't we there when they wailed and cried out to us in anguish while being starved, raped, beaten and stoned by these beasts? 

How can we right the haunted looks of horror in the eyes of the rescued and help them overcome their traumas? Where are the men? I've seen so many pictures online of the rescued and I haven't seen any men or young boys? Where are they? Have they met the fate of the Yobe school boys who were slain, shot and burned?

Why have we allowed this amount of bloodshed and grief to go unchecked and unpunished till date? What have our intelligence been up to in six years? What stopped and prevented them from working to restore sanity and peace upon our land? 

Will I ever get answers to these questions? Will the forest ever stop burning?









Picture Source: Yahoo News http://news.yahoo.com/nigeria-freed-women-girls-food-medical-care-122554323.html

The Effects Of Forgetting The Children




Remember the tugging post I wrote here about how we have forgotten about the children as we go about our daily madness and chaos? Well, seeing this picture of a four-year-old child who saw a photographer with a camera and immediately assumed he was aiming a weapon at her so she surrendered. That sad haunted look of defeat in her eyes stemming from having seen the horrors of war and persecution will haunt me for a while yet.


Monday 4 May 2015

The Purity In A Child's Mind.



So we were at a wedding party yesterday and I got my troops keeping busy by giving them writing materials. My daughter would write out a letter and ask my son and I to name an animal that started with the letter. If we got it right, she would ask us to clap for ourselves. It was cute, engaging and funny until we got to "X"! 

She wrote out the letter X and proceeded to declare that "pizza" starts with "X"!! She then asked her brother to write out pizza and as he wrote it out, she started crying and throwing a tantrum. 


I was bemused at her tantrum and tried my best to calm her down because her brother got the spelling right after all, but she wasn't having none of that. Hian!!!  
I let her let it all out, cleaned her face and then asked her to write out her way of spelling "pizza". Boy did she blow me away! 


The picture above is her interpretation of how to "spell" "pizza". I was gob-smacked when my brother-in-law explained it all to me. What she's drawn is simply the shape pizzas come in and to her pure mind, that's how they are spelled. It was humbling experience, viewing things through the eyes of a child. She beamed at me as the penny dropped for me. It was a moment that would stay with me forever. :) 

Notice the shape and spelling? LOL

In the light of this discovery and because this month of May (21st) would mark a year since I've been blogging (yes, a whole year has gone by, whoop whoop), I have decided to get a box of pizza and some add-ons for one of my blog readers next week. Yes, oh come all ye faithful blog visitors, lol. The 10th person to leave a comment on this post will get a box of pizza sent to their address of choice sometime this week.

Let's gooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!

This Is Unbelievable.




In the WTF-did-I-just-watch section today, I have the video below for your viewing. *holds laugh*. Now, remember that whatever interpretation you make of this, it's all on you. Yup, it's your mind. LOL








Ok, so I learnt it actually isn't really a children's book. The authors wrote it with adults in mind. Could have fooled me. -_-

'Tis A Brand New Week


Hello dearest blog visitors, Happy New Week to you all. Thanks for visiting and for being #AllHeartsAlways to the needy around you. Yes, I am in a good mood this morning just because. :) I have decided to rid myself of all negative energies no matter the challenges I'm faced with but rather pull positive energies towards me and exude same to those around me. That's why I'm in such a cheerful mood. 

I would be having a give-away sometime today so keep checking in. I want to surprise someone with a take-away delivery today. Curious? Keep checking and be the specified comment-er on the give-away post and it would be yours. See you soon. :)