Dance With My Father Again

I never really got it, the pain of losing a parent but I do now and truly death stings. 😩My dearest King Daddy has gone to be with the Angels. It all still feels like a dream to me, and I often find myself wishing I could literarily turn back the hands of time and sit with him for a full day, maybe even get at least one dance in with him. 💔

I really do not know what to do, how to feel, how to move forward from this pain and the crushing heartbreak et al but I am definitely taking things one hour at a time and praying fervently that God grants me strength to get through this. Not one day at a time but an hour per time because, clearly, now I understand when they say grief comes and goes in waves.

I feel God had somewhat prepared me for this period ahead of time because the events and experiences I have had since the beginning of the year and me retracing my steps back to God are what has held me up since my King Daddy passed. There are no words to describe the numbing pains and feeling of helplessness but just knowing that God is my ultimate source holds me up and keeps me going through it all.

                                                   

We laid him to rest on the 8th of November and it was beautiful. He would have loved it and been very proud of us. God, I miss him so bad it hurts. we all miss him. Truly, only God can comfort the grieving because nothing anyone says to me penetrates enough to soothe me or helps me makes sense of this tragedy that's befallen me. (This is not to undermine your unwavering support o) Yes, he lived well and impacted lives but the huge tragedy here for me is not being able to reach him whenever I want to anymore, ever again o. Ah! To be able to rewind time just a wee bit....... 😞😭😫

                                           

💔